Change you can believe in...ha.

So as my usual paranoid self, I'm anxious about possibly everything! Moving, flights, visa, finding a job, my relationship with Emilie, having friends, getting another visa, where to move to next....

It's like its all happening so fast and I want it to, but at the same time, despite not being that happy with my job I am in a good place. A place where I feel loved and secure. But I like moving and I like pushing my boundaries because I am terrified of staying still, of being the same. I relish change and the challenges that brings with it.

And tonight I'm starting to back up my belongings and I'm trying to embrace this but I'm scared.

Things I will miss...

So I am starting to get all nostalgic and I haven't even left yet. In fact I don't leave for another 3 1/2 weeks!
Instead of trying quell my nostalgia I am giving in and writing a list of things that I shall miss.
Here it goes!

• Good coffee, preferably from Toby's. Annoying thing about America they seem to want you to order complicated things and then not understand when what you order is simple. AND they don't seem to comprehend 'strong' or 'double-shot' this may become a slight problem for me....
• My room. Although its small and kinda cramped, I've lived here for 2 years and I really like it and it feels comforting and like it's "my" space and I kinda like that.
• Going out and actually seeing people I know. Um so I'm a twin so everyone that EVER went to school with me recognises me and then there's the lesbian scene, like really when do I not know people? This is one of those I love to hate things, so when it doesn't happen anymore I will feel free to complain. 
• My friends. In particular Jacob and Boe. Even though I haven't spent that much time with Jacob recently I know he's always there for me. Not having them nearby when both of them have been so close to me for so long is going to be a real challenge. Along with how is this going to affect our friendship? 
• Books. I am a little bit crazy about reading. And even though I love political books, fiction is my first love. And I also have a rather nice collection of children's books, because I'm weird. And I'm putting a huge amount of them in storage (note: my mum's place ha.) and that's probably one of the things that makes me kinda sad. 

Oh well I can't think of more and I'm tired and off to be so I can suffer through yet another day at work. Oh the joy!

Boxes!

So I started to pack some of my things away. I kinda want to do it slowly because I need to get rid of a LOT of stuff and when I say a lot I mean it.
So Diana kindly stole boxes for me from work and I've started to pack up my books, which is really kind of sad because if you know me I'm a little bit crazy about books. But I looked up how to store books and everything and hopefully I haven't fucked it up and they will still be beautiful looking when I get back to them.

So... I hope October 12 comes sooner rather than later because I am really really over working with my manager. The end.